- men in bars: wow I sure hope this girl doesn't reject me
- women in bars: wow I sure hope that guy looking at me isn't a literal murderer
Anonymous said: How do two girls have sex?
It’s a very serious process. First, you have to clear the area of all things religious. If there is a cross anywhere within a 100 foot radius, Jesus will know what you’re doing and you’ll go to hell immediately. Once that’s done, you must play Tegan and Sara on repeat. Before you begin the sex, you both must pray the goddess Ellen and receive her blessing. Then comes the main event. Start with the pussy. You each must find a cat to pet in unison. After awhile of that comes the scissoring. You’ll take turns cutting each other’s hair until you both have achieved Justin Bieber’s 2009 ‘do. To finish, watch an episode of The L Word together.